My name is Anna Shore, and I work as an engineer with the Small IT Group (SITG) at the Big Private University (BPU). We have a manager – Bob. Bob is incompetent, overweight, unattractive, uncouth, socially awkward, and generally, not a very nice person at all. Very soon after Bob became our manager, he began insisting that we (all eight of us) address him as Executive Director. When we realized that he wasn’t joking, we got together and did a lot of soul searching, trying to determine what evil deed in our past could have caused the unfair sequence of events that brought him into our professional lives. But, finally, after a great deal of introspection, we decided that no amount of collective evil was sufficient to justify such a brutal cosmic injustice.
For a while, we were convinced that Bob had no redeeming qualities whatsoever. But then, something happened – Bob stopped showing up for work on a regular basis. Several times a week Bob would take a vacation day, a personal day, a sick day. Sometimes he wouldn’t even bother explaining his absence, acting as if spontaneous five-day weekends were simply the norm. And that is how everyone came to wonder – where is Bob? The question became perpetual in the office and among the other people at BPU with whom we work. And that is when I took up my current hobby – keeping chronicles of Bob’s strangeness at the office, and away from it. What is lacking in facts has been more than made up for with an overactive imagination.
This blog is about us, Bob, and the bizarre things that he does instead of coming to work.
I never thought I’d like this kind of stuff, but Bob’s adventures and quirky habits are so utterly absurd, sometimes even kafkaesque as to be absolutely comical.